how to get the girl of your dreams
by labrat love
Summary: Nick's love life needs a little help. So when Catherine and Sara make a startling discovery they turn to the one person they know they can count on, Greg. However their plan works better than they could have ever hoped for! A nick&greg fic, T for safety
1. a blog entry by Gregory H Sanders

How to get the Girl of your Dreams

a Blog entry by Gregory H. Sanders lady-killer extrordinare

So, here I am poised at my keyboard once again, ready to dig deep into my well of knowledge to help the less informed.

I realize that not every man out there has as much luck with the ladies as I do. I know that for a fact because the majority of the comments on my last post were something like why don't you do a piece on girls? Or "gee Greg, your knowledge of science is impressive, but there are no posts about you your life or your _love life._..I think your just another geek at his computer unable to get a date." That was the one that got my goat. I'll have you know I get lots of ladies, I just choose not to write about it. I don't think any of my dates would appreciate having our evenings out written play by play on line, so lonely geeks can live vicariously through my posts. Here I thought you people were reading my blog to learn something about the exciting world of forensic science. Oh well, here you go...

Women love a confident man, one who is sure of himself but not cocky. But that doesn't matter if you are really good looking, or have some other redeeming feature, right? WRONG, no cocky at all got that tiger?

A sense of humor is a must, no lady wants a man who's only jokes begin with "Knock knock." If wit is not your forte, at least give it a try. Who knows she may find your attempt "kind of cute."

Try being vulnerable once in a while, show her your warm fuzzy side sometimes. No woman wants a man who is high and mighty all the time. If your sick (even if it's only the sniffles) let her take care of you. They have a nurturing side, let them use it!

I find women like my unique style, try being yourself and if she really likes you, you'll know she really likes YOU. You know what I mean.

There are a slew of other words in my extensive vocabulary I could suggest trying out, words like

gentle, polite, empathetic, responsible, trustworthy. Think of the qualities you want in a best friend, and make sure she can see them in you.

There, there are some tips, not a lot of them, but just so your satisfied here are some tips on how you can tell if she is interested in you, just so no one can say I didn't leave them satisfied **wink, wink**.

If she pretends she can't hear you and leans in closer, or if she watches your lips while you are talking, it may be because she is thinking about doing something else with those lips...

The inner wrist and the back of the neck are vulnerable places, they are also erogenous zones, if your seeing a lot of them, chances are she wants to see more of you. It also means she trusts you, so make sure you don't betray that trust!

Okay there you go, I hope that is good enough for you, anonymous poster who thinks I don't have a life outside my lab-coat!

Greg finished his post and put his head down on his desk, the truth was he hadn't had a date in about a year. He just didn't want all of cyberspace to know.

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The next night Nick was cornered in the break room by his two female colleagues.

"I told you! I really don't have any time to date right now. I would appreciate it if you would stop looking at me like I was on a stud farm. I'm sure all of your friends are lovely but, the night shift at a crime lab is not really date friendly." Nick was tired of the women's week long attack on his love life. "And what's with the sudden interest in seeing me attached?"

"Well Nicky, your not getting any younger." Said Sara through an innocent smile.

"I think what she means is we haven't heard about any ladies lately, and we are just concerned for you happiness." Catherine tried her best to soothe her slightly ruffled coworker.

"Thanks for looking out for me and everything but I don't think I want to be out in the game right now."

"Well howabout you tell us what your looking for and then we'll leave you alone."

"So all I have to do is tell you what I want in a girl and you'll stop trying to set me up with everyone you know?"

"Right, we'll only set you up with women who fit your standards." Sara added brightly. Nick rolled his eyes.

"Fine, they've got to be sweet and clever. I like someone who is intelligent, not just one of those bleach blonde bunnies just looking for a "nice guy," you know the ones. But I do like blondes, tall ones. And they've got to be unique really one-of-a-kind, one with lots of self-esteem. They gotta keep me on my toes. And please, please don't find me somebody afraid to eat! I'm from Texas, we show affection with food! After that I suppose all the normal things. Cute, funny, good with kids, likes animals, you know what everybody wants.

"Gee, sounds like you would have married Greg by now." Said Catherine with an eyebrow raised.

"I just might if it'll keep you and Sara off my back!" Nick responded in semi annoyance as he left the room.

"Did you hear what I heard?" Catherine asked as soon as her friend was out of earshot.

"Yeah, he said "they" or "them" and not "she" I think there's something Nick's not telling us."

"Hm, I think Greg may actually stand a chance."


	2. how to get the man of your dreams

Catherine and Sara sat in Sara's apartment trying to figure out what to do with their confused friend.

"Do you think he even realized what he was saying?" Sara asked.

"No, I don't think so, that's what's gonna make this harder. I don't think he's realizes he's in the closet."

"He's probably in there so deep he can't see to get out." With that the women sat back and began to think of ways to help Nick see the light. It only took a few hours for them to realize it was near hopeless. There was only one thing they could think to do. They needed help.

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Somewhere else in Vegas, Nick sat in his favorite chair with his laptop, and did something he would never admit to anyone he did. He checked Greg's blog. It's not like he was ashamed to admit that he checked his friend's blog. He just didn't think it was something that he should tell everyone he did. He wasn't sure why he felt the compulsion to read it, but ever since he got that "your friend has started a blog" e-mail, he checked it often. He smiled to himself reading Greg's latest entry._ I never doubted you buddy. _Then unexpectedly there was a knock at the door.

"Mr. Stokes?" Asked the tiny woman at the door.

"Hilda you know you can call me Nick. Now what's up?"

"A1, A6, and A14 said they have an ant problem and they are all over the laundry room so were going to have the building fumigated, it's going to be over the weekend, I just wanted to let you know in enough time to find another place for a few days."

"Alright, thanks for the heads up. You have a nice night ma'am."

"You're welcome Nick, such a good boy."

Nick smiled as he watched his elderly landlord shuffle to the next door over. Then he realized he had nowhere to stay. All his family was in Texas, and the only close friends he had were at work. _That won't be so bad though._ He thought.

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The next night at work Catherine and Sara worked a case together. Much to their frustration this kept them from the coworker they needed to talk to most. It did however give them time to decide if their plan was the right thing to do.

"But Cath what if he's not, and then we get him mad at us? How are we going to explain ourselves?"

"Uhm, we can just say it was a practical joke, you know what he said before he left the room. And are you sure we're going to the right person for this?"

"Yes, I'm almost one hundred percent sure that he's the man for the job. I mean you know him, he's up for anything."

"I suppose you're right."

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What the women did not know was that after they left the two men they were discussing were sent out on a case together, and their plan was set in motion before they even had a chance to say anything.

"Hey G, my building is being sprayed next week do you think I could stay with you for a few days?"

"Yeah Nicky no problem, as long as you don't snore. I'm a light sleeper."

"I don't think I do"

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After work the women practically pounced on Greg in the locker room.

"Uh, hi there ladies, can I help you with something?"

"Yes actually Greg, we were wondering if you could help us out with a delicate situation." Said Catherine straightening his collar with motherly softness. Greg smiled nervously.

"There is a mutual friend of ours who is lacking in the relationship department, and we believe that you can help us and him out."

"Okay, sure. What can I do to help?"

"We can't actually talk about it here, but howabout we take you to breakfast?" Sara asked knowing plying Greg with food was probably the best way to go. Not only that but they could talk without the worry of having someone walking in on them.

"Mmm, alright I am starving."

After a short discussion on where to go, the group met at one of Catherine's favorite breakfast places. She had given directions and told them she would be there after she got Lindsay to school. After she arrived they ordered and the women wasted no time getting down to business.

"So we thing the reason Nick hasn't dated in a while is that he's gay."

Sara's lack of delicacy caused Greg to nearly choke on his OJ.

"Or maybe Bi." She said realizing her earlier lack of tact was probably not the best way to begin the conversation. Catherine sighed and tried to think of the best way to ask the looming question. Fortunately Greg got it out there himself.

"And you were wondering if because we were such good friends, I could find out for you? He said you two have been pestering him about dating for a while."

"Yes, that's it!" Catherine said with more enthusiasm than needed. What Greg did not know was that was not the question they were going to ask him, but what he didn't know...

"You know I've had my suspicions for years, but I didn't think anyone else did. Anyway sure I think I'm game, after all everyone deserves a little happiness, even if they don't know they're unhappy. Lucky for you he is staying at my place for a while, his place is being debugged."

"Perfect, maybe you could guy talk it out of him."

"Guy talk? You mean take him to a bar and see if he hits on any hot guys when he's smashed?"

"Maybe you could rent Brokeback Mountain, all the cowboys, both of you would enjoy that." Sara teased. Catherine tried to hide her grin behind her napkin.

"Oh man you told her didn't you? Ever since I had you over for the game that once, and you found that calendar, you have been merciless! That's why you wanted my help isn't it?"

"Greg" Catherine tried to keep her giggles under control. "Sara never told me anything about you. We just picked you because you and Nicky are good friends. That and you are the most open minded person I know." Greg turned pink having just revealed his own secret. "Now about that calendar?"

"Studs N' Spurs" Sara giggled, "hey I don't blame you I wouldn't say no if October wanted to tie me up!"

"Ew, Sara that crosses the sharing boundary. And of course you had to find the only piece of that stuff I have. Why couldn't you have found my playboy collection! And Cath before you ask, I am equal opportunity as far as my relationships go, I bat for both teams."

"Well now that that's out in the open, let's get back to business shall we?"

After an hour or so of debate and stratagem they agreed on a plan.


	3. how to get Nick

**here you go a nice long chapter!!**

Friday night rolled around and Nick brought his things over to Greg's, and was greeted with the usual enthusiasm.

"Heya Nicky, well I don't really have a spare room but your welcome to the couch. Or if you're secure in your masculinity I have quite a spacious bed."

"Well I'll see how the couch treats me and if I wake up grouchy well you may have to share." Nick said lightheartedly.

"So whattaya wanna do? It is Friday night, we don't have work for the next two days. Me, personally, I'm going to fall asleep early and not wake up until, I don't know when, then I want to spend Saturday in my pj's for as long as I can. Man I love weekends off."

"You said it G. I think you have one good idea there. I think I may take you up on that."

"Excellent. So ya hungry? There is the greatest little pizza place down the street a friend of mine works there, and I haven't seen him for a while."

"Sounds good to me!"

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At the pizza place Greg was almost tackled by one of the waiters.

"I thought you moved or something I haven't seen you in like forever!"

"I've missed you too Tony I should come by more often, but I brought a friend this time!"

"Ohh, he's cute!" Tony added with a wink. Nick turned red.

"No Tony, we're just friends, now can we have our table please?" Greg feigned annoyance. Tony bounced them over to a table and took their drink orders. When he returned with the drinks it was clear that they were not going to get away off that easily.

"So Greg, if he's not yours can I have him? What's your number honey?" Tony asked, turning Nick a deeper shade of red than he had been before.

"Tony!" Greg exclaimed, even though this is exactly what he wanted him to do he still had to pretend to defend Nick. "Nick's not gay..."

"Oh, spoil all my fun then! Fine I'll settle for what type of pizza you want!"

"Uh, one with everything, if that's cool with you G?" Nick was determined to not show how embarrassed he was. Greg nodded.

"Alright Tex anything you want." After Tony had left Nick visibly relaxed.

"Sorry man, I forgot how excitable he gets."

"Nah that's okay Greggo, I'm just not used to that kind of attention. How do you two know each other?"

"Well if you can believe it we sat next to each other on the plane to Vegas, and he's really afraid of flying. I had to talk to him the entire time to keep him from freaking out. Then we kind of hung out for a while, and we still keep in touch."

"Kind of hung out?" Nick asked not really sure of the answer he was going to get.

"Well I guess you could say we dated. I hope I'm putting that gentle enough."

"Yeah." Nick was not surprised by his friends admission but he didn't expect it either.

"I hope that doesn't weird you out or anything."

"Nah G, you're still my best friend." By that time the pizza had arrived and both men ate in silence for a moment.

"Okay this has got to be the best pizza I have ever had, I can't believe it's been right under my nose the whole time!"

"You bet, I know how to pick 'em."

When the check was brought to the table Nick insisted on paying.

"Your letting me crash at your place the least I can do is buy you dinner." So while Nick was distracted Tony waved Greg over.

"Are you sure he's not gay? Coz honey my gaydar is never wrong."

"Actually I was hoping you could tell me if her was. I'm doing a favor for the girls at work"

"Well you can tell them he's, pardon my Rodgers and Hammerstein, gayer than laughter. And I'd be careful if I were you."

"Why?"

"I think he's got a little crush on you."

"Are you kidding me?"

"Nope, cross my heart, he has nicknames for you, he laughs at everything you say, and you should see the way he looks at you."

"Tony everyone at work calls me those nicknames, and lots of people laugh at everything I say."

"Oh well suit yourself, you have a big sexy Texan practically in your lap and you are not gonna go after him?" Greg shook his head. "Alright then, well if you find out he really is gay and you still aren't gonna do anything send him my way!"

"Alright Tony" he said giving his old friend a hug "take care of yourself, and I promise I'll come around more often."

"You better or I'm gonna come find you!"

On the walk back to the apartment the men tried to decide what to do next.

"You know my shelf of movies and stuff just pick one."

"I dunno G, that's a lot of choices."

"Oh yeah you'd rather watch a bird documentary."

"Hey lay off my birds man!" He said giving his friend a playful shove.

"Alright, alright, but the night is still young, and the world is our oyster!" He said wrapping his arm around his friends shoulder.

"I got the picture G, thanks. So do you have any suggestions?"  
"Well there is this little club I hit up some times. Some drinks, some dancing, some nice scenery. Wink Wink."

"Don't tell me you want to fix me up with someone too!" Nick shrugged Greg's arm off.

"No, you can fix your self up."

"Alright good for a moment there I thought you were gonna pull a Cath & Sara on me." He said patting Greg on the chest.

"Far from it! So my car or yours?"

"We can take mine."

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At the club the boys took a spot at the bar as sort of a base to come back to, although it didn't seem like Nick wanted to dance that badly.

"Alright Nicky suit yourself, I'm gonna go unwind!" Greg made his way over to the dance floor, but before he did he stopped further along the bar. A buxom brunette was serving drinks.

"Hey Paula!"

"Oh my little Greggy!" She said and leaned over the bar to kiss his cheek. Greg got a jealous glare from another patron at the bar. He just shrugged.

"Hey Pj, could you do me a favor?"

"Anything for you pet."

"Could you keep an eye on my friend over there? He's the dark haired one at the other end of the bar. Watch and see who he's interested in."  
"You got it chief!" She said giving him a knowing look "Now get out there and dance, I know that's what you came here to do!"

Greg bounced to the dance floor, and proceeded to unwind. Nick sat at the bar and unwound a different way. He was finding it hard to relax though, watching Greg sinuously wind himself around a pretty blonde was making him feel funny.

"'Nother one please." He said to the bartender. Paula obliged.

"So your one of Greg's buddies?" Nick nodded, "From work?" He nodded again. "You wanna talk about anything? Oh don't give me that look, I have been in this business long enough, I know when someone has something on their mind."

"Well," He said, his accent thick, "I always thought he might not be completely straight, I just didn't know how I would feel finding out the truth. And then at dinner I met one of his ex-boyfriends. Now I feel funny around him."

"He has a contagious disease funny or wanna kiss him funny?" Paula probed.

"I don't know. He's still my friend but something is different."

"Well whatcha gonna do about it? You can't just go on feeling funny forever, eventually you are going to have to do something about it."

"I know you're right I just have to figure out what." he said leaning into the counter.

"Alright the sweetheart you let me know if you need anything." Nick nodded in affirmation. Then he turned towards the dance floor again. Greg was still with the blonde. Nick watched them grind to the beat of the song. Both of them smiling, if there was ever a time Nick wished he could dance this was it. Then the music changed to something slower, and the girl waved him goodbye. Greg started over to Nick when he was stopped by a bold young man. Nick could see them talking for a moment, then they began to dance. It was a slow sway, their bodies were pressed close together. Nick could barely stand it, he wasn't sure whether he needed to drink something stronger, or to get away. He decided on the something stronger twice. He downed the last one quickly and when that didn't work he decided to get some air at the next song change. Fortunately or maybe unfortunately there was another somebody out getting air. It was the man Greg had been dancing with. He was maybe a little younger than Greg, with intense eyes and the same wild blond hair.

"Hi" he said when he noticed Nick.

"You'er dancing with Greg in there." He said now regretting the two something strongers he had downed on top of all the beers. He felt fuzzy.

"Yeah" He responded with smug satisfaction. "he's a good dancer. Mmmm, yeah. I'd like to see what he's like in the sack."

"Hey don't talk about my Greggo like that!" He suddenly became very possessive. He didn't like the thought of Greg and this guy together.

"What, jealous?" He asked, eyebrow raised. "I knew he was going over to you, that's why I stopped him." Now Nick was furious, he caught the kid by the collar and shoved him against the wall of the building.

"You leave us alone, both of us, do you hear me?" The other man's response was to close the gap between the two of them. It took Nick's alcohol addled brain a moment to realize what was going on. He was being kissed by another man. It took him another few seconds to decide what to do about it. The logical portion was telling him to slug they guy, but unfortunately the boozed up Id's argument was much stronger. Nick found himself kissing him back. It was at that moment Greg came out looking for Nick.

"Hey Nicky I..." Greg stopped, the two men against the wall stopped. The younger man released himself from Nick's grasp and strutted over to Greg.

"I knew I could get a rise out of him."

"Lay off him alright." Greg said shoving him slightly, he retaliated and soon the men were scuffling. The younger stronger man had the upper hand and Greg found himself loosing. The final blow was a clear shot to his eye. It connected, and Greg was temporarily stunned. So the other man sneered and went back into the club.

"C'mon Nick, we're going home." Greg said as soon as he could talk again.

On the drive back Greg looked at his drunk friend in the passengers seat.

"What were you thinking man?"

"I don't know, he reminded me of you I guess."

Hahahahaha! I leave you here wanting more! The dastardly cliff hanger strikes again!


	4. How to get Greg

**sorry about the delay...and the horrible cliffie...I'm starting a new semester, and adjusting to being back in school, but I will not abandon my boys! (well they aren't mine but you know what I mean!) This is not so much a funny chapter, but it's an important one!**

"He what?" Greg asked with quiet shock.

"He reminded me of you okay?" Nick half shouted in his drunken state.

"Oh." Greg said quieter than before. The rest of the ride to Greg's place was spent in tense silence. Greg trying to process everything and Nick trying to process anything. They pulled into the parking lot near the apartments and the younger man helped his friend out of the car. Then he helped him up the stairs and into his own bedroom. _There is no point in him waking up with a hangover on the uncomfortable couch. _After making his ambiguous friend as comfortable as he could get Greg wandered to his kitchen and opened his freezer. He thought for a moment then backtracked to his bathroom, he retrieved two aspirin and a glass of water and placed them on the bedside table. Then he returned to his freezer. Shuffling around it's contents he decided to nurse his already heavily swollen eye with a bag of frozen peas.

Then he sat on his couch and tried to make some sense of the night. He took Nick to dinner, then to a club. He danced, Nick got smashed. He danced with a guy, Nick kissed a guy. _Nick kissed a guy that reminded him of me. There is no way Tony could be right...it was probably just the alcohol. But then again they say you won't do anything drunk that you wouldn't do sober..._With that as his last thought Greg slipped into a restless sleep.

The next morning Nick awoke in a strange room to the sound of bare feet on a wooden floor. Then a door slammed causing him to wince. He rolled over and when he saw the aspirin and water he remembered where he was. Taking the pills he decided to make his way into the living room. The unpleasant sounds coming from the bathroom made him wonder if Greg was just as hung-over. Nick sat on the couch and was puzzled as to why there was a bag of peas on one of the cushions. After a moment he heard the toilet flush and Greg emerged.

"What happened to your face G? Did I do that? Oh please tell me I didn't hit you last night!" Hangover be damned Nick leapt off the couch at the sight of his friends ugly bruise.

"No you didn't hit me Nicky, relax. I got into a fight with some jerk and he took a swing at me."

"You? Got into a fight? About what?" Nick's mouth hung open a little.

"Well, um...you."

"Oh I see. Are you gonna tell me the rest of the story?" Nick sat with his jaw set listening to his friend recap the previous night's events. He left out the conversation they had in the car, for obvious reasons.

"Thanks for defending my honor G, even if I did make an ass of myself." He said gently touching his friends bruised cheek. He whistled low. "That explains my whopper of a hangover. Thanks for the aspirin by the way."

"No problem."

Greg spent much of the afternoon trying to figure out how to tell Nick the rest of the story. There was no easy way around it, so finally he decided to just go for it.

"So Nick."

"Yeah G?"

"There is part of the story I haven't told you." He wrung his hands nervously. "Later in the car we had sort of a fight, and I asked you what were you thinking when you were kissing that guy." He stopped dreading Nick's reaction to the continuation of the story.

"Go on..."

"I'm trying, I'm trying. Well you said you kissed him because...heremindedyouofme."

"What? You gotta slow down man, I can't understand you when you talk like that!" Greg took a deep breath and began again.

"You were kissing that guy, and I asked you why exactly you were doing that and..."

"Yeah, I got that much." He prompted.

"You said you kissed him because," Greg closed his eyes "he reminded you of me." He flinched.

"Oh."

"Yeah that was my reaction too." Greg said after a pause long enough for him to realize he was not going to be punched.

"Well, I can see why you hesitated. I guess we have to talk about this now huh?"

"We can pretend it never happened if you'd like." Greg was hopeful that would be the solution.

"I'd like to, but that would only make things worse. See I haven't actually been honest with everyone."

_Here we go, I'm going to have an answer for the girls. _Greg tried to distract himself from his other thoughts.

"Well, you know how Cath and Sara keep trying to set me up with their friends?" Greg nodded. "Well I went out with them a first, and they were great gals don't get me wrong. But there was something missing. We hit it off and stuff, but there was no spark. Then on one of the dates she had to make a call and the waiter came over, he was being really friendly and then it hit me, we were flirting. I didn't even realize it until after she came back. After I took her home I thought about it for a while and I felt more flirting with him than her. That's when I sort of realized I may be dating the wrong kind of people, if you know what I mean?" Greg nodded again. "I'm telling you this G, because I trust you, a lot, and I know you won't go telling everybody right away." Then the realization hit Greg, he had his answer, but he couldn't tell anyone. He wouldn't do that to Nick. "Then after a while I realized something else. That I get that same feeling when I'm around you. I hope I haven't scared you or anything. I just wanted to let you know. And I know that you and I are different in that department, well...because I read your blog, and that last post..." Nick was beginning to ramble nervously. Greg sat and pretended to be listening. When in reality his brain was picking apart what Nick had just told him. _He thinks I'm totally straight, and he thinks I'm cute...and he's still talking..._

"Nick, shhh." Greg said putting a finger to Nick's lips. " Now I want to tell you something. I'm not totally straight, you know that. You just met Tony. And you can trust me not to tell anyone about you. And I liked it when you came to the lab too, and when we're on cases together. I like that a lot. I have idolized you since the day I met you, and over the years it's turned into more than that. Now I hope I'm not scaring you at all." Nick shook his head. "Good because I have a question for you. Would you like it if I kissed you?" Nick did not respond right away. It seemed to Greg like he was fighting pretty hard with himself.

"Are you asking me that because of that guy?"

"No, I'm asking you that because I want to kiss you."

"Oh." That was the second time that evening that Nick was rendered nearly speechless. His mouth still frozen in the shape of the vowel, head tilted slightly to one side. Seeing his friend stuck in thought Greg took action. He ever so slowly leaned in, turning his head the opposite way as Nick's and brought their lips together gently. It was a quick soft kiss, he didn't want to put Nick off. Nick sighed heavily and smiled a little. Greg had to use all the self-control he had not to pounce on he co-worker after their lips had touched. He didn't have to hold out for much longer because Nick acted on his thoughts. Leaning in and bringing their lips together again, the kiss was longer the second time. Then Nick sat back.

"You okay Nicky?"

"Yeah, It's just I..." He never finished his sentence though, instead he kissed Greg again.

I** hope this is not too much of a cliff hanger. And sorry again about the long break, I was going to finish and post it over the weekend, but I couldn't bring my computer home...I promise the time between posts will get shorter!**


	5. okay you got me

Greg woke up that morning spooned gently against the object of his affection. He sighed happily and snuggled in closer. After the confessions last night the men both agreed to take it slow. They decided that simply falling asleep together was a good first step. However as Nick shifted unconsciously and tightened his grip on Greg, Greg realized what a horrible idea that had been. Nick was fully erect and only the thin layers of sleep pants separated him and Greg. He tried to wiggle away slightly so as to not encourage the tenting already obvious below his waistband. Nick on the other hand had won his prize and was not about to let it go, his hold was as immobile as ever. Greg whined softly and tried to ignore it. When it was clear that was not working he tried to weasel away again.

"Where do you think you're going?" Nick asked, his voice thick with sleep and accent.

"Um, nowhere?" Greg hesitated.

"Good. I like you right here." Nick tugged him back the few inches he had managed to squirm away. This only worsened Greg's problem. Now Nick was breathing softly on his neck in addition to being fully flush against him. Greg was not sure how long he could stand the sweet torture being inflicted upon him. Finally he couldn't stand it anymore.

"Gah! I can't take it anymore!" he said and wormed as far away from Nick as he could get.

"What? What's wrong G? Oh did I do something? I'm so sorry!" Nick was on the edge of panic, he didn't think he could take rejection so soon.

"No, well yes." He turned to look at his bed-mate. He was shirtless and the bulge in in his pants was obvious. "Ah!" Greg stood up and Nick was able to see his problem. "You, YOU, are here in MY bed with out a shirt on, and well you have a little something," He gulped "or a rather large something going on down there." Nick blushed furiously. "And you are breathing on my neck and you smell so good and...i can't touch you." He whined. Nick grinned.

"Who said you can't touch me?"

"Well last night you said you wanted to ease into things, but you're just right there in my bed looking good enough to eat, and I don't want to scare you or make you do anything you don't want to... Oh god, did i say 'good enough to eat' out loud?" Nick nodded. Greg groaned and set on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands, the throbbing ache between his legs as bad as ever. Nick laughed softly and sat next to Greg on the bed.

"I really appreciate that you respect me so much. That means a lot." Greg mumbled something noncommittal. "But did I ever say that you who looks just as edible with your tousled hair, and your soft cotton T-shirt, and a big problem of your own, couldn't take some of your frustrations out on me?"

"No." Greg responded like a pouting child.

"Well then what are you waiting for? Don't think mine's not bothering me either. And I think if I'm gonna make breakfast it's gonna be a lot easier if this gets taken care of." He said gesturing to the tent in his sleep pants."

"You serious?" Greg asked with eyebrow raised.

"Yes G, I'm serious."

"Not joking or anything?"

"No not joking, C'mon we've known each other for a long time, we hang out a lot, we're both so comfortable around each other. I trust you. Besides if you don't get you butt over here and do something about it like I know you want to, I'm going to lock myself in your bathroom and take care of it on my own." Nick's last remark caused Greg to shudder. The image was too much for him to handle. He pounced on Nick and covered him in kisses.

"Thankyouthankyouthankyou! You won't regret it! You can say stop any time and I'll stop!"

"Greg!" Nick shouted. "Shut up and touch me already!"

"Yes sir!" Greg said gleefully between kisses. His full weight now pinning Nick to the bed. This was a semi-foreign experience for the ladies man, but that did not stop him from reacting. When he placed a tentative hand on Greg's rear the younger man sighed into his mouth and repositioned himself so Nick's legs were between his. Nick lost in sensation abandoned his earlier hesitations and gave in. The hand on Greg's rear stayed there, the other went under his shirt to the back of his neck. Greg gave a frustrated growl and paused for a moment to remove his shirt.

"Having fun?" he teased when he noticed Nick's hand didn't leave his butt.

"I can't believe I never noticed how nice you ass is before. I can't believe it's taken me so long to get to this point."

"Well you don't have to wait anymore, unless you would rather I just straddle you here for the rest of the morning and let you fee my ass?"

"Tempting but no." The older man said as he tugged him back down. Now his hands wandered Greg's back and the soft skin of his sides. All the while taking in the feeling of the chest to chest contact. He breathed in sharply as his friend began to rock his hips slowly against him. He lost most of his ability to function after Greg licked a stripe from his collarbone to his earlobe. That was fine with Greg, he was more comfortable in control of this situation than Nick was, and all he wanted was for his newfound lover to enjoy himself. Greg continued the liquid rocking of his hips as he nibbled Nick's earlobe and explored his mouth with his tongue. Nick was surprisingly vocal. Greg's kisses and nibbles earned gasps and moans particularly when he closed his mouth around a nipple. He smiled, who knew man-of-few-words Nicky could get this loud. Finally Nick had had enough.

"Touch me." he gasped.

"Can I?" Greg asked.

"Ohgodyes. I can't take it anymore." Greg slid down Nick's sleep pants revealing a healthy erection. Greg stopped for a moment to admire Nick's now fully naked form in his bed.

"Greg. Just finish it!" Nick growled. Greg grinned and took Nick in his mouth. A string of endearments and profanity issued from Nick's mouth as Greg gave him, what Nick thought was probably the best blow-job in his entire life. Much to his frustration he was so tightly wound that it didn't take Greg long to finish what he began. Afterward he crawled up and rested his head in the crook of Nick's neck. The older man responded by kissing his temple and wrapping an arm around him.

"Holy cow Greg where did you learn to do that?"

"Um, I'm a sponge and I absorb things?" Greg was not sure if Nick expected an actual answer.

"Well thank you to whoever you absorbed that from." After Nick had time to recuperate and regain his mental processing he realized Greg was still hard as a rock.

"Do you um, want me to help you out there?"

"That might be nice, I can always lock myself in the bathroom while you make breakfast."

"Nope, not allowed G, not after you just took care of me like that. I think I'll return the favor."

"It's okay you rea..." Greg never finished his sentence. Nick had slid his hand down the front of his sleep pants and wrapped his hand around Greg's erection. This was a completely new experience for Nick, but it didn't take him long to realize he enjoyed it immensely. He loved the way Greg was so soft but still rock solid in his hand. He loved knowing that he was the one making Greg pant and grind his hips. He loved most of all that he rendered Greg completely speechless. It wasn't that he didn't like listening to Greg, he could do that for hours. It was that Greg was so engulfed in sensation, the sensation of what he was doing to him, that he could not form words. That did not stop him from trying though.

"ohgaNick, justabit fasterplees!" Nick obliged and shortly after Greg came into his hand. "Thank you." he panted.

"Anytime."

"Really?"

"Yeah really."

Greg mustered all his coordination and kissed Nick thoroughly.

"Now c'mon G, I'm starved how do you like your eggs?" He said as he got up and wandered into the bathroom.

Over breakfast Greg decided to tell Nick about the girls. He took it better than Greg had expected.

"I sorta knew they were gonna try something like this. You're not really gonna tell them are you?" Nick looked hurt.

"No, of course not, if you don't want them to know I wont tell them. I can just say you picked up a hot blond at the club and I wouldn't really be lying."

"Thanks Greggo. I don't think I want them to know yet, just gimme some time?"

"All the time you want. But they're smart eventually they are gonna know something is up between us."

"Yeah, whoever thought it would be a good idea to pay those women to snoop should be tied up and left in the desert!"

The rest of sunday was spent in various states of undress, and degrees of arousal. Greg was almost certain he was in heaven having gotten more than a shiner from the fight. Nick seemed so eager to learn the ropes, so to speak.

"You know we have to go to work later right?" Nick asked.

"Urg, don't remind me." Greg was more than happy to remain half naked in bed with Nick for the rest of his life. But when the alarm went off, both men were forced to get up and spend the night around dead people.

**It's not over folks! what happens when they get to work? How will they fend off Sara and Catherine? that all goes down in the next chapter!**

**(P.s. I really enjoyed writing the 'I can't stop talking I'm so overexcite and sexually frustrated' greg)**


	6. how to get Cath and Sara

**again words cannot express how sorry i am that this is so late!!! please enjoy anyway!! **

Greg and Nick had successfully managed to avoid Sara and Catherine for the better part of the week, but both of them were smart enough to know that it couldn't last forever. Sure enough Thursday afternoon Greg let his guard down.

"Hi Greg! I, ah, haven't talked to you in a while. How was your weekend?"

"Fine Cat thanks for asking." He responded knowing his co-worker didn't appreciate the nickname.

"So you had Nicky over didn't you?"

"You know I did."

"Right, how did that go? You guys have a good time?"

"Oh yeah, how was that?" Sara had found them.

"We had a good time...you know doing guy stuff..." Both women looked at him expectantly. "We ate pizza we went out to a club, we slept in the next morning. What else do you need to know?"

"How was the club? Catch Nick staring at anyone?" Greg sighed.

"Well he was after this totally hot blonde."

"Guy or girl?"

"Sara, it's none of your business who Nick decides to hit on!"

"So he was checking out guys!"

"I didn't say that!"

"No, but if it was a woman you would have said 'blonde chick' or something!"

Greg was getting frustrated and afraid of the hole he was digging for himself. He desperately didn't want to squeal on Nick, but he knew the women were going to get it out of him. "Look ladies, whether Nick is or is not gay, or bi, or a drag queen or whatever is not your business!" Greg began a rant. The women looked at him with mild amusement. "He's not a queen, I will tell you that! But just think of Nicky's privacy! maybe if he didn't know he was gay, he wouldn't want anyone else to know either, hypothetically!"

"Okay, you're right Greg. We don't need to know."

"Damn straight you...oh...kay. Really?" Both women nodded. "Oh, alright then. I'm just gonna go over here and change then. Have a nice night ladies." But before Greg could dart off Nick entered the room.

"Hey babe still commin' over tonight?" Greg answered with a dumb stare. "Oh hey you two, tellin' secrets?" He said as he walked past the three of them playfully slapping Greg's butt. "Gosh you look so cute when you stare like that, c'mere." Nick smiled and tugged Greg over kissing him squarely on the mouth. Both women's jaws dropped.

"Ah, Nick I was just telling the women here about our weekend, and things that may or may not be true..."

"Did you tell them how hot you look on the dance floor? Or how you're one helluva kisser? Or That you like it when I..."

"OKAY!!! Nicky! can I talk to you for a second over there? Please?" He said dragging his friend around the corner. "Are you out of your mind! Cath and Sara were right there!" He hissed.

"Yeah, Greg I know."  
"I thought you didn't want them to know! I was fending them off for you!"

"I know, and I thought about it and, it's not fair that they were going after you. And well I don't care if they know. They were gonna figure it out sometime so I thought I would help it along. Besides If they find out I want it to be from me."

"I see. Well if that's the way you want it, more power to ya."

"That is exactly the way I want it Greggo, so are you coming over tonight?"

"If I get out of the locker room alive after your little display of affection."

"I think you'll get out just fine." Nick responded leaning in to kiss Greg.

CSICSICSCSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSICSI

On the other side if the lockers the two women listened silently. When it became apparent the men were no longer talking they finished up and crept out of the room. They made it all the way to the parking garage before exploding into exclamations, and victory dances.

"Are we good or what!" Catherine said with a smile from ear to ear.

"I wasn't sure that was gonna work out." Sara panted.

"Well you know Greg, he's nearly irresistible!"

"Thank God Nick thinks so too."

"I hope this works out for them. I wouldn't want to beat either one of them up."

"Nope, I think they're gonna be just fine. Hey Cath?"

"Hm?"

"Who should we work on next?" At that moment Archie chose the worst possible moment to enter the parking garage.

"Hi Catherine, Sara" he said tentatively not exactly sure he liked the looks in their eyes.

**H'OKAY, so there's the fic, in it's entirety, I hope you enjoyed! umm, R&R K? a new one will be up soon, I hope...and check out my new C2 for a challenge!! (Ratty's Total Strangers Challenge!)**


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